George Floyd Square

 I live in a St. Paul suburb and don't get to Minneapolis very often. Today while running errands I realized I was not far from George Floyd Square. I had never been there, so I decided to pay a visit. Cars can now drive through, but slowly, because there are still many tributes set up in the street along the sidewalk by Cup Foods and on the spot where George died. People still visit and mill about, so cars go carefully. Also, the famous raised fist and garden is in the center of the intersection of 38th and Chicago, which helps slow down the traffic. I did not feel in danger from traffic while there.

These (above) are about a block from the famous intersection.

A quilt was among the many tributes and memorials.

the spot where Mr. Floyd died

Being there is an emotional experience.

It still hurts.

Disappointment of the day: this shop I had heard of doesn't

open until 3:00 PM, and I was there at about 11:00 AM. I will be back.

Why I Don't Drink

I started listening to a new (to me) podcast: Inappropriate Questions. It is produced by CBC (Canada). So far I am enjoying it. Some of the questions they have discussed include "Have you had the surgery yet?" (transgender issues), "Are you able to have sex?" (disability issues), and the most recent that I listened to, "Why don't you drink?".

This question about drinking is a little less obviously inappropriate. It depends a lot on context, who asks and how they ask, and the non-drinker him or herself and what they feel comfortable with. Several people were interviewed and had a few different takes on how it can feel to be asked that question. It prompted me to think about myself, and how I feel about that question.

I say I don't drink, but technically, if even a drop counts, I do drink very rarely and infrequently. For example, I will sometimes have a Mike's Hard Lemonade (have had two or three in my life, I believe), or an occasional Mimosa (again, maybe 2 or 3 times in my life). And when I happen to imbibe, it is usually because I am getting it free.

I grew up in a Methodist household. My dad was a Methodist minister, and Methodism was and is strong in my family heritage. Methodism, in its history, took a strong stance against drinking alcohol. Officially it is still in favor of abstinence, although it is less strict now and encourages people who choose to drink to do so responsibly. My childhood household was wholly in favor of abstinence, and that is how I grew up. The act of drinking was seen in judgmental light. So, that was the attitude around which I grew up.

The first time I ever tried any alcohol was (guess when) during college. I had a drink once at an event; I think I was 19. Then I didn't drink anything again until my 21st birthday. I went to a bar and got the bar tender to give me a free drink.

After that I continued to drink very rarely. A couple of times as an adult (in my 30s), on two different occasions, I drank maybe two drinks, enough to get light-headed and silly. But I never liked that feeling and later was embarrassed at my silly behavior.

The final straw took place when I traveled with my husband. We were at an event. They had a table at which people were encouraged to sign a sober pledge - pledging not to drink at all from that point on, for the rest of one's life. As a person who drank so rarely I could almost call it never, I glibly signed the pledge, and went merrily on about my business. That evening we attended a dinner which was paid for by the company with which my husband was affiliated. Since it was free, I decided to order a drink. I took a couple of sips, and then suddenly remembered the pledge I had signed earlier that day. How glibly I had signed it, when others who struggle were being encouraged to sign the pledge, and maybe had to do some real soul searching before they could take that big step. I felt guilty that I had made a pledge and then had immediately broken it. For people who really had the problem, signing the pledge that day would have and should have held some great importance in their lives.. a turning point, one hopes.

After that I promised myself that I would never drink again, and in so doing I was honoring the pledge I had signed and attempting to be in solidarity with those who signed it with a lot more difficulty than I had. I did abstain from any alcohol for a long time after that.. many years. But in the last five years or so is when I have occasionally had a Mike's Hard Lemonade or a Mimosa. And to be honest, even those drinks were probably taken due to peer pressure (even at my age).

I'm still a Methodist (now called United Methodist), and I am proud of the Methodist tradition of encouraging abstinence. We still will never have a Methodist event at which alcohol will be served. We take that stance seriously, though as I stated above, it is more open to individual decisions these days. I admit I like the fact that I don't ever have to question whether I'll be in the presence of alcohol consumption at a Methodist event. I am not comfortable in drinking situations, and would hate to have to juggle my way through a church event with drinking being part of it. I'm happier without it being an issue at church.

As for being asked, "why don't you drink?" , I do feel a little uncomfortable with that question. The reason is because of the judgmental attitude in which I grew up. Drinking was just seen as wrong and bad. I enjoy a 99% alcohol-free life. I'm happy that I don't drink (for the most part). But when being completely honest with myself, I have to admit that I still do feel some of those judgmental feelings that I was taught. I try hard to separate the drinking from the person, so that I'm not being judgmental about the person but only about the habit. But it is hard. When trying to explain why I don't drink, I find myself sounding judgey, and I don't like that. I don't want to be that. So in my case, it is an uncomfortable question, though I wouldn't go so far as calling it inappropriate.

There. Just thought I'd share. It was on my mind, so I wrote.

Happy middle of summer! Hope you are enjoying some beautiful days. Read any good books lately?

A Whole Month Later -- Catching Up

It has been a MONTH since I posted?? I guess I didn't feel I had anything newsworthy, which never stopped me in the past, as my readers well know. These are such strange times... continuing quarantine at home, plus all the unrest which started here in Minnesota after the death of George Floyd. I didn't know how to address it all. (Also, my depression reared its ugly head for a while, so I wasn't enthused about writing.) I'm all in favor of radical change. It's about time we finally address our racist habits here in the USA. I think having the conversations is a great start. So many of us white people, definitely including me, have had easy and oblivious lives, unaware of how truly difficult it has been all along for people of color. I thought I was "woke" but I see I was not. So.. I'm trying to read and learn all I can. This will be an ongoing goal of mine.

Meanwhile, my sister got married!! She was divorced many years ago (which is sad no matter what, and each situation contains its own unique story of sadness). And then a year ago she attended a 50th school reunion in the town where we used to live as kids; we moved away from there when I was 12 and she was 13. She has always been good at keeping in touch with people from the past. Me, not so much. I would never have attended that reunion. Anyway, while there she re-connected with a family friend/classmate. His family had attended our church where our dad was the pastor. And we used to go out to their farm fairly often to have dinner and play around. You know, for a town kid to go visit a farm, it's always memorable and there's so much to do. We have good memories of that family.

So when my sister re-connected with R., we thought it was quite cool. And he is a very nice man. His wife of many years died of cancer 3-4 years ago. Sis and R. were both in the right position to be open to a new relationship. And this one went fast. They felt close immediately and a year later - Boom! - they got married. They figured at age 69, why waste any time? And R's mother is still alive; she is now 97, understandably getting frail. So they wanted to hurry on her behalf as well.

The wedding was small - a crowd of 10 - and we practiced social distancing. It felt quite odd to not be able to hug and be close at a wedding. I did sneak in one quick hug with my sister, but kept my distance from my new brother-in-law. It was a fun, happy day. I must say that I have not seen my sister this happy in a LONG time. I am thankful that she and R. found each other.

They got married at the chapel on the campus of the senior residence where R's mother lives. My son was videographer. Here he is shown interviewing R's mother. He intended to get taped comments from all ten people, but ended up getting only that one. And the final pic is Sis and R opening the gift we gave them.. it's something they have to choose, so it's just a written description.

I am happy to report that my depression went back into hiding. I'm feeling quite good again and am interested in my fun hobbies again. I have been mostly sewing, because oddly, I have not been able to concentrate on reading! During this time when I could be reading up a storm! What's up with that? I figure it'll come back to me eventually. I hope you, my lovely readers, are healthy and happy. Keep safe, everyone!

Turns Out I Was Right

[featuring random pictures of quilts made by me]

Once upon a time there was a woman named Carol who loved quilts and wished she could make some by herself. She didn't consider trying, because, she thought, "I'm not patient enough." With the encouragement of friends and her mother, Carol finally decided to try. Her first attempt was a pot holder (haha.. it turned into a quilt).

After that she was hooked and has been making quilts like crazy ever since. It has been 20 years and 4 months, and she is still going strong. Or is she?

That Carol is me, of course. Lately I have been feeling uninspired.

I know, slumps are normal. I go through them periodically and just wait.. eventually I once again get enthused.

In recent weeks I have been dealing with some major-ish depression. I'm getting help with it, but it is causing me to ponder and re-think everything about my life. This includes my quilting.

When I see all the gorgeous things other quilters create, I realize, "I will never make that. I'm not patient enough." So, while my quilts are pretty, and I enjoy making them, and people seem to appreciate them, I will never achieve that awesome level that so many have achieved and seem to maintain. It turns out I was right about myself. I'm just not patient enough.

I don't have what it takes to do the projects that require stick-to-it-ive-ness. Once in a while strange things happen, and I make a masterpiece. I have done that twice. Most of what I make, however, is "nice." I think I'm OK with that. I don't need to be famous; I don't need to be making top-of-the-line awesomeness every time I sit down at my machine.

my masterpiece

I get the most joy out of making charity quilts. I love to make them pretty. After all, poor and/or sick kids deserve some beauty in their lives, too. I have never uttered the words "it's just for charity" in the sense of making ugly stuff is OK because it's for charity.

Meanwhile I'm waiting for my enthusiasm to return. I have been sewing, but I can only manage the mindless stuff. Things that don't require careful 1/4-inch seams, for example. Scrappy stuff. Quick stuff. While the depression rages on, it's all I can manage.

And when I get back to being enthused, I will be happy with "nice" and accept the fact that I am not patient enough to achieve that certain level of art and beauty that I so admire in other people's work. To be honest, I'm even OK with not being patient enough to do that type of sewing.

Charity quilting is what makes me happiest. Meanwhile, I'm trying to remember how to feel happy. It's just one of those dips in life. While being not fine, I'm fine. Things will look up once again.

Farewell, MIL

Yesterday my mother-in-law died. She had a stroke and hung on for about a week. She was 89, leaving behind her five adult children, 8 grandchildren and two great-grandchildren (another one due in April). She had been so resilient over many years, surviving serious conditions that we had expected to do her in long before this. What a tough lady!

It was a blessing that many of her family members could be with her in her final days. My children now have lost all four of their grandparents. It's sad, but they were lucky to have known all four of them into adulthood.

My husband has been so sweet to his mother. He has had his weepy moments but is overall doing OK.

Try not to take your loved ones for granted! (This advice is mostly for me.)

my MIL on left, age 2, with her sister, age 5. Sister preceded her in death.

Not Very Motivated

For the last year or so I have not felt very motivated to write blog posts. I notice many blogs have either slowed down or stopped completely, so I guess I am not alone in this feeling. Blogs may be slipping into the black hole of "old technology." I'm not ready to stop writing here. But.. just be aware that I probably won't be posting very often. Mostly these days I am posting book reviews.

I will continue to post occasional quilt and people photos as I am inspired to do so. Thanks for hanging in there and continuing to check my blog! I do enjoy having visitors and readers.

I am still babysitting Bonus a few times per month. I hadn't seen him in a long time, because I went to the UK and then I got sick, and it lasted a long time! So he was a little upset at being left with me, because he wasn't used to me any more. But he cheered up in a hurry, and we had a happy day. He is now 2 years old...still as pleasant and nice a kid as always. I call him Mr. Agreeable.

The Year Begins in Korea...

This year for Christmas my husband and I decided to buy one airline ticket to South Korea. Our daughter jetted off to spend some time with her brother who lives in Korea. They both thought it was a good idea and a good gift. It was for both of them, really. Other than that, they each got a book and a tiny bit of spending money.

Turned out to be an excellent gift which they both enjoyed immensely. They spent a few days in Korea, Daughter seeing Son's neighborhood and where he works and meeting his friends. Then they flew to Naha, Okinawa (Japan) for Christmas. They wanted to go somewhere warm, so they agreed to do this trip within a trip.

Daughter's caption on this photo read: I flew to Korea to see my brother! He looks pleased to see me.

Here's an Okinawa Christmas.

also appreciating the attractive manhole covers:

and the warmth and beauty of the beach:

On Christmas Day they saw Star Wars. It was in English with Japanese subtitles.

Back in Korea, here is a picture of Seoul. You probably know by now that I love to take pictures, and I take a LOT of them. My kids are not like me at all in this regard. This is about all I got to see. But this particular picture is monumental because of its circumstances. Daughter said: Went into Seoul solo while my brother worked. Took a bus, train and the subway all by myself!

They brought in the New Year in the city where Son works. All too soon it was time for Daughter to come back home. Husband and I felt so happy at the great reports we'd heard from them, and this final Facebook post from Daughter:
I can't explain how much this trip has meant to me. How much seeing my brother has meant. All you need to know is that he's amazing, and I'm going to miss him.

We think they're both amazing, and we are very pleased that they had such a magical time together. It was worth every penny.

The treats Daughter brought back for us -- cookies from Okinawa. The purplish ones on the right are sweet potato!

Drum Roll Please..... POST #2,000!

My goodness... I have been blogging for a long time, since 2006. This post is my 2,000th post! Can you believe it? Some of you have been faithful readers the whole time! I really appreciate you who actually read my blog. It's OK if you read sporadically. It's also OK if you pause here to glance at quilt pictures only, ignoring my crazy rants and thoughts on other topics. I just appreciate that I have some readers!

I am going to show you two quilt pictures. I think I posted them before, but they ended up being used differently than I had anticipated. It was fun! A friend asked if I had any baby quilts on hand that she could purchase. She has two nieces who were about to have babies and wanted to send them each a quilt. This one was completed, and I gave it to her, asking her not to pay me but to make a donation to our local women's group at church which supports a lot of good mission programs around the world (United Methodist Women). I loved the backing fabric on this one.

I made this second one to experiment with the pattern, and then I decided to offer it to my friend for her second niece, who had her baby the next day! Great accidental timing!

In the past, when I reached a milestone blog post, I used to run incentives for people to leave comments, and based on those numbers, I would make a donation to my favorite local charity. I decided not to do that this time. I'm just celebrating quietly (and with some shock and awe) that I have written 2,000 posts, and even better, YOU have come here to read. It has been a fun 11 years! I'm not going away, so keep on checking Giraffe Dreams as you have the inclination. You rock!

Since I started writing my blog, I have gone gray!

Total Eclipse: Stunning!

Hubby and I went to Grand Island, Nebraska to experience the total solar eclipse on August 21. We decided to witness it on the grounds of the Stuhr Museum. Traffic was backed up the minute the grounds opened at 8:00 AM, but it limped along at a steady crawl, and we got in and parked with plenty of time to spare and plenty of parking spaces left for more people. The grounds are huge, and they had room for thousands. The whole time we were there, until the last few minutes, traffic kept coming in.

If you have ever watched a partial eclipse, you have an idea of what the waiting time was like. The moon gradually moved into the sun's path, but we couldn't see any difference on earth. We put on the special glasses and looked. It seemed to be a small bite out of the sun for the longest time. Finally the moon moved further over the sun, and we were surprised to see that there was still very little evidence on earth. The sunshine was still bright; it did not feel like dusk at all until the eclipse was nearly full. That gave us an appreciation for just how bright and strong our sun is. With even a sliver of it left shining, it felt like full sun.

Near us was a young woman who teaches middle school science. She was so excited about the eclipse, and she ran periodic live Facebook lessons for her students. Her excitement was contagious; it was very fun to listen to her explanations of what was happening. She told them she was "nerding it out with 15,000 other nerds" and that we were all excited.

Below: (1)a fraction of the large crowd that spread throughout the huge museum grounds
(2)the science teacher, with phone in hand, and her sister, watching the unfolding excitement

For a while the surroundings took on a bright yellowish tinge... hard to describe, but the colors were just odd, and the shadows were different. Under the trees, we could see crescent-shaped shadows, from the eclipse shining through the leaves.

The temperature dropped. It felt chilly. It got a little dusky feeling. Crickets started to chirp. Canada Geese flew in "for the night" to rest with their buddies in the nearby pool. There was a sunset-y looking sky all the way around the horizon. You can see that in this picture of people, all looking up.

Then came the full eclipse. I'm telling you, friends, it was soooo awesome! I can't even describe it! The crowd oohed, aahed, cheered, made noises of disbelief. It is INCREDIBLE, having night suddenly happen in the middle of the day. SO AWESOME! I was stunned at its beauty. We could finally look directly at the sun/moon/corona. Glorious!

We could see a few stars. Then, slowly, the moon kept moving, now getting out of the sun's way. First came the diamond ring. That, my friends, is another gorgeous moment. This picture of the diamond ring is from NASA. I couldn't get a good pic of it myself.

Then the sunshine came back, it was daytime again. We were still in awe, kind of in shock. People stayed put and were quiet for a while. Then..
back to normal. The sun was shining again. People packed up, went to their cars, and left. Just remembering this experience gives me shivers. If you ever get a chance to experience a full eclipse, DO IT! Next one is on April 8, 2024. Start studying that path now, and make your plans to be there. If we're still able to walk and travel, we will be there with you.

RIP, FIL

My father-in-law died on July 2 at age 97 years and five months. In June he fell and broke his hip, and he never fully recovered after that. In the end he decided to stop eating, and he died a few days later, with many children and grandchildren having been there to see him and say our goodbyes. He went on his own terms and peacefully, exactly as he wanted. One can't ask for any more than that. Now my mother-in-law must try to adjust to her new normal. They had been married 67 years, so this is a big task for her.

Here they are in January when we celebrated our family Christmas. I'm so glad I took this picture.

Rest in peace, H., knowing you left a legacy of your wonderful five children, eight grandchildren, and two great-grandchildren. We shall carry on with love.

Paula Poundstone!

Saturday morning Hubby and I drove to Fargo, ND. From our home it is about a 5-hour drive. The reason we went was for a road trip/date that I had secretly planned. I ended up telling Hubby what it was a few days before we went.

Hubby is a big fan of Paula Poundstone. I found out she will be in our area at a time that we can't attend her show, so I looked at different venues, and Fargo was the closest. Why not, I thought. It's time for a little road trip/get-away.

Turned out it was a lot of fun. We enjoyed the drive -- well, we enjoyed the time to just chat, knit, snooze (if not driving), and slow down our busy lives just a little. The drive itself is pretty flat. Driving straight up a freeway into the Red River Valley...there's not much there other than flat farmland. We enjoyed ourselves despite the lack of awesome scenery.

Here's a restroom in the hotel.. mirrors on every wall. I posted this on Facebook saying my jail cell is full of mirrors.

Here's where we ate dinner. The food was excellent. We did not eat frog; it was an option!

Here's us at the theater.

And here's Paula! We had a lot of fun. She is very funny.

Guess what. Paula Poundstone owns 14 cats!

Mom Stuff

Our daughter recently moved away, a two and a half hour drive from home, to start a new job (a promotion). Recently she sent some photos and happy messages about how pleased she is with her new job and her new city of residence. It's the first time in her life that she has not lived in the City, other than her brief stint being away at college. It has all been a very new experience for her; I am so happy to hear how well it is going and what a good fit her new job seems to be. Hooray!

This is how she made the move. She purposely wanted to do it by herself (symbolic of being independent) and wouldn't let us help her move, other than a little lifting of boxes which was done here, before she left town.

in her new city

Our son is also doing well being back in Korea. His new job is keeping him busier than he expected, I think. He had planned to spend a certain amount of time writing (he wants to write a book). I don't think he has had enough time to do the "other" stuff he had hoped to do, but the good news is that his job is going well, and he is happy. He is playing on a baseball team and loving that.

This is an old picture, taken in Korea when he went the first time.. I don't have one of him on this go-around (yet).

I love it when my kids are happy!

A Six-Year-Old's Wisdom

One of my cohorts in politics posted this online: a drawing by her six year-old son. She gave me permission to share it here. He is a wise little soul.